THE PLANET SEDNA, 8902 A.D.

"Hey, hey!" Chibiusa said, sitting down on the ground in almost a child-like pose, even though she was as stunningly mature and beautiful as a goddess herself. "Tell me another story about the past! Help me remember everything about everyone!"

"They are so gonna kill me if I make you revert back to type," Sakura joked. "But what the heck. What's next?"

Chibiusa's red eyes shone with anticipation. "I heard Michiru-chan was evil once, Sakura-kun! What happened to that?!"

Sakura leaned back on the grimy dungeon wall and whistled. "Oooh, that's a looong story."

Underneath Chibiusa, the almost flattened Chibi-Chibi groaned. "This hurts.... chibi..."

SUBURBAN SENSHI THIRD ANNIVERSARY OVA EPISODE TWO: HERO WORSHIP

By Doctor Xadium

August 21st, 2005

FLASHBACK - JANUARY 14, 2004

Michiru scowled as she remembered the scathing words those fools had spoken and her response to them.

"FINE," Michiru said acidly. "So that's it then. All of you think I'm a worthless poseur whose only function is as a fashion accessory for Haruka and a battery for Usagi-chan's Ginzushou. Well, I'll show you all exactly what *Kaioh Michiru*, acting alone, without limits, is REALLY capable of. And when I'm done, you will ALL acknowledge my superiority... you won't have ANY CHOICE."

"When next we meet," Michiru said, not even looking back to acknowledge Haruka, "you will bow in submission before me. Sayonara."

"I told you before I don't like those kinds of games!" Haruka protested.

Michiru smiled, as she faced Haruka and the other ignorant peons, her plans finally at fruition.

"So you weren't talking about S &--?" Haruka began, haltingly.

"Of course not!" Michiru said angrily, ripping open her blouse--

"This is HARDLY the TIME or PLACE!" Hotaru exclaimed, averting her eyes. Haruka and Kamesennin nosebled-- for .01 seconds.

--to reveal a solid black T-shirt with the letters "[ n G o ]" scrawled on them in white.

"Non-governmental organization?" Jedite asked curiously.

"No, FOOLS!" Michiru said imperiously, as Chibimecha (w / My Little Pegasus), a grey-alien looking Mutanex, Nephlite (w/halo) and Naru emerged from behind her, all wearing similar shirts. Each of them made a strange handsign.

"Everyone, please welcome my new Evil Team... the New Galactic Order!"

"When you're with the New Galactic Order," the others chimed, "You're with the New Galactic Order... 4 Eternity."

Haruka and Jedite sweatdropped.

"Hey, it's JUST like a FAMILY Reunion!" Professor Tomoe chortled, as he and Son Goku appeared with the Seven Dragonballs.

"Be seeing you," Michiru said darkly as she and her Evil Team vanished in one of Nephlite's transport portals.

END FLASHBACK

LATER THAT DAY, HALFWAY AROUND THE WORLD, AZABU-JUUBAN

"Hahahahahahahahahhhaha!" Nephlite cackled as he fired blast after blast of dark ki bolts at the Kaioh House, smashing its infrastructure to pieces, mentally imagining the look of shock and horror that that fool Ten'ou would be wearing on her face when she got back from the Tournament. He relished the thought of finally having his vengeance.

"Gew babi, yah!" Osaka Naru screeched, banging her head into Michiru's rented black Jaguar sedan into pop her starseed out of her head. The next second, black tentacles ripped out of the ground and surrounded her; when they exploded away she stood proudly in the white and gold-trimmed Sailor fuku of Sailor Supervolt.

"Can you not find a less brutish way to transform?" Michiru asked with a groan as she observed the dent in the roof of her sedan, left eyebrow twitching.

"Hay, at leest im nawt naked lyke yew uddah senshis are," Supervolt screeched in her half southern, half Brooklyn accent. Pivoting around, she swung her arms around in a wide arc and pointed them at the house. "ALKALINE TIDE!"

A tide of volatile acid splashed forth from her fingertips just as the Ten'ou House exploded. The liquid tracked its way around the explosion site, carving a massive "n G o" into the ground, so large that it could only be properly visible from the air.

"Wooo!" Mutanex, who was dressed up in a sleek white chauffeur's outfit, screeched. Wearing a surgical mask to cover his grossly deformed Michael Jackson-esque face, he pivoted and did a dance step in place, placing a hand on Mecha-Chibiusa's shoulder.

"10 PRINT 'Do Not Touch me, Freak!'" Chibimecha exclaimed with a growl, swinging the My Little Pony version of Elios-- which she had attached to her little purse by a golden chain slammed right into its nether regions-- around.

"Oh god the pain," the tiny horse rapped, "You're [BLEEP]ing up my brain!"

Chibimecha's robotic eyes slid sideways as she regarded the tiny talking horse, and she pulled it up to eve level, licking its face seductively. "10 PRINT 'We're never going to be apart, ever, ever ever.'" She smiled cutely, and then tightened her fist around the plastic toy, exerting unbelievable pressure, almost cracking its shell. "Right, lover?"

Elios wheezed and spat up silica gel. "Right...lover." Mentally he cursed whatever fate had brought him to this. The robot was using him like some kind of peace of meat, well plastic-- he was the horse with the force! He was the user, the abuser! It wasn't fair that he should get the short end of the stick whenever she felt like she needed some d[BLEEP]!

Although, he realized to his irritation and yet pleasure, due to his toy shell, she got the short end of the "stick" too.

"Excellent work, everyone!" Michiru said, clapping her hands in front of her in a satisfied gesture, absently stepping on the unconscious, prone form of Artemis, who had had the misfortune to teleport in from the future just a millisecond before the house had exploded.

Ignoring him, she turned and regarded the chaos around her. Now, now, she would show the world what she could do.

"So, Leader," Nephrite began slowly, spitting the words out, still hating the idea of taking orders from a Sailor Senshi. True, he took orders from Naru, but she was a Phage Senshi, and those orders usually involved whipped cream and a rapidly rocking futon. "What now? Do we bring darkness to the world, casting it into a thousand years of chaos?" He laughed darkly. He would be the one to show Jedite who the true heir to legacy of the Dark Kingdom was!

"No," Michiru said flatly, arms crossed in front of her chest.

"No...?!" The response from the others was unanimous, and shocked.

"No...." Michiru repeated, a smile forming on the edge of her lips. "We will become... superheroes."

Nephlite could have just died on the spot--- well if he wasn't already dead.

"Yaaaay! Yaaah! I gets tah be a supahheero jast lyke youse guys!!!" Sailor Supervolt exclaimed, jumping up and down, clapping her hands excitedly.

Chibimecha looked on with indifference, more interested in taking her plastic playmate back to the 30th century for some fun.

Mutanex frowned under his mask. He was a mighty Zetan Commander, used to conquering planets, not saving them!

"Yo Mich, what da hell is this s[BLEEP]t b[BLEEP]ch!" Elios exclaimed, his tiny little voice squeaking out of the toy comically.

Michiru's smile did not waver, though her eyes narrowed dangerously. Patiently, she explained. "Everyone, villains are easy to hate. Children grow up playing Ultraman so they can pretend to beat up villains. The scales of karma are balanced against you. How many of you 'Villains' have ever actually won anything more than temporary gains, before being beaten up by something as pathetic as a bunch of short-skirted schoolgirls and 'the power of love'?"

Nephlite fumed. "Minor setbacks," he growled.

"Hey ain't you one of that posse, little miss bossy?" Elios chirped.

Michiru laughed condescendingly. "Yes, dear. Which is why *I* am your leader today." She pointed to a bulletin board in the distance which celebrated the great hero, Mr. Satan. "Those who save the world as opposed to menacing it get several tactical advantages. They are allowed to operate more or less in the open as they see it. They receive the love, support and energy of the people they protect. They get media exposure, funding from merchandising rights, everything you villains don't."

Somewhere across the Pacific, Spider-Man sat in his dank sewer watching the rats scurry past as the Daily Bugle called for his arrest right after he saved the planet from the Beyonder.

"Well,, unless you're a mutant," Michiru snapped, heading the inevitable counteroffer off at the past. "That is AMERICA and this is JAPAN, where little impressionable children hold the purest power, and are capable of using it to do things like summon giant space turtles to crush evil!"

Everyone was forced to concede the point. The looming Spectre of Gamera overhead made it kind of impossible not to.

After waiting for the alien to spin away, they continued to speak.

"So... we're just posing as heroes, yes?" Nephlite asked, hope tinging his voice. The sheer humiliation of being called a g-- goo--- good-- he couldn't even bring himself to think it--- a GOOD GUY was too much for his black heart of darkness to bear. When he had been stabbed in the back all those years ago, and when Naru had called him that, he had cried, not for the pain of the impaling, but of the blow to his manly Dark Ego.

"No, we become heroes!" Michiru exclaimed arrogantly, hands on our hips. "The people will love us, will hand us the world on a silver platter! O HO HO HO HO HO HO HO!"

The others looked at each other dimly.

Michiru beamed as the sun rose behind her, framing her in its rays. "Quickly then, to our new base of operations! Kaioh Heavy Industries!" She pointed to the east.

Slowly, unenthusiastically, the members of the New Galactic Order piled into the car and drove across town.

KAIOH HEAVY INDUSTRIES, 22:00 HOURS

The corporate headquarters of Kaioh Heavy Industries was a giant, Victorian-style mansion set besides a gigantic metalworks factory deep in the outskirts of Tokyo. Michiru and the others slowly walked the marble floors, Naru being the most taken in my the sheer display of opulence that surrounded her. The building was steeped in history.

"Whoze dat?" Naru asked curiously, pointing to an elaborate painting of a reddish-brown haired woman in an elegant kimono worn off the shoulders, which was placed prominently in the hallway.

Michiru looked up at the picture for a moment. "That, dear, is my maternal grandmother, Kanzaki Sumire. One of a noble line, as is only to be expected. She took charge of this place when it was still known as Kanzaki Heavy Industries. Like all the women of our family, she was strong and proud, and worthy of respect." Michiru's features turned dark. "Not like her worthless son, that gambling, womanizing weakling of a Yakuza aspirant, who nearly bankrupted the company."

"You're talking about your father," Nephlite pondered.

"Yes, it took my mother to restore honour to the family line, which she did with a swift kick to the crotch of his pants." Michiru nodded solemnly. "She took over The Kanzaki Group and renamed it the Kaioh Group, and brought honour back to these halls."

Michiru pirouetted slightly, arms wide. "This place was once one of the lynchpins of the defense of the Imperial Capitol, and so it shall be again as we make it our new base of operations!"

"We should just use the resources here to make an army capable of crushing the country!" Nephlite roared. "We could be gods of these sheep!"

"Says he whose plans have obviously brought him so much," Michiru said sweetly, condescendingly, flicking Nephlite's halo.

"Oooh, BURNNN," Elios mocked in his chipmunk-like voice.

"Shut it!" Nephrite exclaimed in anger, zooming forward and smashing his fist into the toy.

Instantly Chibimecha swiveled and smashed Nephlite in the midsection with her tiny fist, sending him crashing into a wall.

"Don't Ewe hart mai babee!" Naru screeched, headbutting the wall and transforming, sending a blast of electricity at the mechanoid, whose somewhat-still damaged body twisted and contorted. Its regeneration had not been as complete as had been hoped.

"Children!" Michiru snapped. "CHILDREN!" Irately, she transformed and hit them all with a Deep Submerge, separating them, and slicking the marble floor. She dropped the transform.

For the next few seconds none of the others, with the exception of Mutanex, who had not moved, could stand, comically slipping and sliding on the ground and crashing to it.

Michiru noted the alien's utter self-control and nodded. He would be perfect.

"Mutanex..." she began slowly.

Mutanex took a moment to reply. He had been entranced by one of the cherubim on a ornate column in the hallway. So smooth, round and youthful... he had always been fascinated by the human species, but now... what.... this was an even more attractive form of human than the females he usually pursued!

"Yes...." he began slowly, still taking in the appearance of the statute even as Michiru spoke.

"Every good hero organization needs a villain to operate as a foil," Michiru explained. "With your freakish face and bizarre alien perspective, you will be perfect. You shall go forth and cause chaos, and we shall save the populace from it."

"Hello?" Nephrite snapped, waving a gloved hand in front of Michiru's face. "The original villain, right here."

"You're nothing but an embarrassing cliche," Michiru said dismissively, her expression changing to one of supreme irritation as she brushed him aside and walked over to Mutanex.

"This one, on the other hand," she said softly, "is something unlike the world has ever seen."

Nephlite fumed. He would never lose to that freak from the fourth density or whatever he called himself!

Michiru nodded, self-satisfied. "Now, before our operations can begin, we must decide on our new Superhero names."

"INPUT 'Superhero Names?', name$", Chibimecha asked, sucking on the leg of her My Little Pony, the water having damaged her circuitry a bit.

"Exactly," Michiru confirmed. "I will be known as "Super Sailor Neptune."

"Oh by Metallia, how original," Nephrite muttered.

"Senshi already have name recognition!" Michiru snapped irately. "Similar, Osaka-san shall be known as 'Sailor Supervolt."

Naru nodded.

"Nephrite-san, you shall be known as 'The Fist'."

"The Fist?!" Nephlite bellowed. "What kind of name is that?!"

"He should be known as the 'hand' yo," Elios chirped. "Because he uses his hand to be--"

Nephlite shot the talking toy with a blast of ki which shattered its shell.

"10 PRINT 'YOU BROKE MY MAN-TOY'!" Chibimecha screeched as she dropped to the ground and tried to assemble the pieces back together.

"Because you always think with your anatomy instead of your head," Michiru muttered darkly. "I would have suggested a different body part but heroes have to have family-friendly names."

Nephrite scowled and paced over to Naru, who cooed, "Don't worrie huny, tah me ewe'll alwayz be mistah big d[BLEEP]k."

"Yah, he's a big d[BLEEP]k all right," the disembodied life-force of Elios muttered, annoyed that no one could hear him. Looking around, he felt his spirit evaporating away at the edges. Licking his lips, he zoomed towards Michiru, intending to fuse with her, but to his annoyance, Mutanex stepped in the way at the last second, trying to talk to her.

"AWW DAMN!" Elios screamed as he merged with the alien, who didn't seem to notice.

"Well as we seem to have lost Elios," Michiru sighed, pointing to Chibimecha, who was sitting on the ground looking depressed, "you will have to fight on as 'Baby Doll' or 'The Tinkertoy' or something."

Chibimecha simply looked at the ground, having lost the will to carry on.

"You broke one of our most powerful members. Congratulations," Michiru snapped to Nephlite, who smirked.

"Bah, this toy is useless," the Dark General muttered, walking over to the robotic girl and giving a swift kick to the head.

Chibimecha turned quickly and bit into Nephlite's foot as it flew to her face, chomping down hard.

"GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Nephlite cried out, shaking his leg and hopping as Naru tried to comfort him.

Chibimecha then resumed sitting in the corner, crying, a black cloud starting to form over her as her energies interacted with the local atmosphere.

Michiru just shook her head. "Naru-san, it looks like it will just be us for the time being. Are you prepared?"

Naru nodded, observing Nephlite with worry in her eyes.

THE NEXT DAY

Sitting around a massive oval conference table, Michiru, Naru, an angry Nephlite and a glassy-eyed Chibimecha waited in the dramatically underlit room, harsh spotlights focused on their individual positions.

In the center of the far wall, a giant television screen flickered, showing a live Ginga TV news feed from Ichinohashi Park. The plan was simple. During the event, in which Japanese citizenship was being conferred on a cute Pikachu with a broken tail named "pipi-chan", Mutanex would appear in the center of the park, take off his surgical mask and frighten the children with his freakish face. At that point, Nephrite would open a teleport portal and Michiru would stride out as Super Sailor Neptune, saving the day with a quick kick to the alien's head.

"It is time," Nephrite said venomously as the clock struck 12.

ICHINOHASHI PARK

"...Aya Reiko reporting!" a cheery pale blue-haired reporter exclaimed happily as she watched the children play in the park, with some of them petting the Pokemon creature that was helplessly tied to a stake pounded into the sand in the center of the playlot. "Today, PiPi-chan will finally become a Japanese Citizen! Hundreds of Gaijin immigrants begging for status are said to be outraged, but who cares? None of them is as cute as PiPi-chan! I even hear Tama-chan the seal might be next!"

"Hehehhe...." came a sinister, high-pitched voice from behind Aya.

Hehehehe...? Elios asked incredulously. What the hell kind of entrance is that, man, you need to get evil like the masterplan!

Mutanex did not hear the protests of Elios, instead striding forth into the center of the mass of children.

"Ara?" Aya asked, looking into the news camera in confusion. "Who's this? Some tall gaijin wearing a surgical mask has just walked into the ceremony! Is this some kind of protest?"

Mutanex stood before the camera and the crowd and dramatically ripped off his mask, revealing his grotesque features (which he considered quite handsome)

"SUGOIIIIIIIIIII" Reiko screeched. "Michael Jackson-sama!! I'm going to try to get an exclusive interview!!"

* * *

Back in the headquarters of Ginga TV, Aya's partner and immediate supervisor, Karasuma Akane, spat out her coffee as she stared incredulously at the TV monitor. She had sent that ditz out on a puff piece and now the international pop megastar Michael Jackson had just SHOWED UP?! How the hell!? How lucky WAS Reiko?!

Akane's red eyes flashed and she dashed her coffee cup on the ground. Her rival had done it again! Curse her phenomenal luck!

* * *

At Kaioh Heavy Industries, Michiru's eyes narrowed. Why were they cheering Mutanex? The Japanese fascination with Michael Jackson was a phenomenon she just could not understand!

Children swarmed around Mutanex in glee. The alien drew back for a moment, fearing some kind of an attack from the tiny humans. But then, he calmed down and regarded them more closely.

Hey... Elios began slowly, picking up on the thoughts of the alien. What the hell dude...

Mutanex remembered that cherubim he had seen in the lobby of Kaioh Heavy Industries.... and saw its features reflected in the small boys that clambered around him.

Aww, no man... Elios protested, as the lewd thoughts began to flood past him. Aww, hellnaw....

Mutanex sat down on the edge of the park fountain, and bade several small boys sit on his lap.

"Michael Jackson-sama---" Aya Reiko began... jaw beginning to drop as she realized what was about to happen, as Mutanex ruffled the boy's hair.

Dude, no... Elios groaned watching Mutanex / his hands preparing to go somewhere they really shouldn't. That's not a chick you dumb.... hell they ain't even grown!

* * *

Nephlite watched the TV screen, a look of sheer shock covering his face. "He's disgusting.....!"

Michiru nodded numbly, then leapt out of her chair. "This is NOT what I had in mind! We have to save those children for real, now!"

Nephlite shrugged. "What, I meant his face. I have no problem with younger women." He pulled Naru to his side and bounced her on his lap.

"Just open the portal," Michiru growled, transforming.

But before Michiru could move, the feed from Ginga TV went black.

* * *

"She's doing it again," Karasuma Akane muttered, tossing her red hair back and dropping into her chair, slumping down in defeat. Damn that Sailor Moon and her examples!

* * *

Aya Reiko dropped her microphone and scurried behind a tree. In a blast of blue light, She transformed.

* * *

At Kaioh Heavy Industries, as Nephlite savored his memories of Michiru's henshin, the Ginga TV feed clicked back on, and Sailor Neptune looked at the TV dumbstruck.

* * *

"Pardon me?" A sailor senshi asked meekly, clad in a somewhat revealing blue sailor suit of alien design, tapping Mutanex on the shoulder.

The alien looked up at her. "What?" It asked in a squeaky voice, hand paused in pre-fondle mode as the boy on its lap looked up and cheered for the sailor senshi.

"Pleased to meet you!" she replied, handing over a business card and bowing. "My name is Sailor Aluminum Siren!" She posed. "NAMBLA and Lolicon Doujinshi might allow it, but I won't! Older men loving small boys is gross, disgusting and sick, and in the name of the Parent's Television Council, I will punish you!"

Damn, Elios muttered in awe as he stared at Aluminum Siren's chest.

Mutanex, for his part, blinked, uncomprehending.

"GALACTICA TSUNAMI!" Siren yelled, smashing Mutanex with a torrent of energy, melting the alien's plastic face.

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.............." Mutanex screamed, dropping into the fountain and grabbing at his face , fingers pressing into the malleable plastic frantically, trying to make a breathing hole.

Elios saw his chance and took it, pushing his consciousness into a piece of the plastic and popping himself out of Mutanex at high speed.

"Ewww!" one of the kids who saw Elios' pellet fly away screeched. "Michael Jackson-sama shot out a big booger!"

Elios' pellet flew into a pile of pills by the park petting zoo. His consciousness reeled from the sudden impact.

"It'll be all right," an old, soft voice said from somewhere, as a rough, calloused hand reached into the pile of pills and picked up Elios'.

"You'll be able to go once again really soon, my beauty," the old man said, patting the brown rear flank of a graceful stallion, just before he shoved his gloved hand with what he believed to be an enema suppository right up.... the place where enema suppositories were supposed to go.

"GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" The horse suddenly screamed, as Elios' personality instantly took it over, filling it with energy.

"You can talk, Secretariat?" The old man asked in awe.

"Of course I can, man!" The horse replied, neighing as it galloped off at breakneck speed.

"Yay for Sailor Siren-chan!!" The little kids cheered as Aluminum Siren sat at the edge of the fountain and shared snacks with them as Mutanex struggled to breathe for a few minutes before asphyxiating and ending up face down floating in the water.

"Oops," Aluminum Siren said with a giggle as she noticed the rapidly bloating dead alien body in the pool. All the children joined her in mirthful laughter as she flashed the camera a thumbs-up and smiled brightly!

* * *

Sailor Neptune just stood there for a moment, watching the screen. "He's dead."

"So what," Nephlite muttered, shrugging. "It's not like we needed that fool."

"We've just lost half our force in one day," Neptune snapped, spinning around. "And now the public loves that ANIMAMATE."

"Animamate is hawd tah sey," Naru observed, trying to say it five times fast. "Aminamay - Animimam--"

Naru's attempts ceased as a brown stallion slowly trotted into the room.

"Ooh, Dinner," Nephlite remarked, donning a Dark Bib.

"What is that...foul barnyard animal doing in here?" Neptune asked incredulously.

"I'm a racehorse, dumbass," Elios snapped.

"10 PRINT 'Lover?'" Chibimecha asked, perking up.

"Oh Metallia it's him again," Nephlite exhaled, pulling out a black energy blade. "Oh well, still a tasty meal!"

"You're just jealous my equine [BLEEP] is bigger," Elios retorted.

"Is it?" Naru asked, looking over at the horse with a sick gleam in her eyes.

"N-Naru..." Nephlite began in shock.

Chibimecha smacked Naru in the face. "10 PRINT 'stay away from my man!'" She screeched.

"Hey baby," Elios said soothingly, trotting over to the small android. "Gimme some sugar."

"Ugh...." Neptune and Nephlite both groaned as the android slipped the stallion tongue.

"BAM!" Elios exclaimed, swinging his head sideways and decapitating the android, who was already falling apart. Its head clattered onto the ground.

"10 PRINT 'I... lo....ve... yo....u...." the android muttered, the light going out of its eyes.

"Yeah baby. Who doesn't," Elios replied, dashing the head against a wall with a powerful kick, and proceeding to stick his nose in her brainpan, slowly devouring her cranial matter.

"OMG he's eatin' hah BRAINS?" Naru exclaimed in shock as she covered her mouth.

"Just *chomp* takin' *chomp* back *slurp* what's mine, lady," Elios the Horse replied, re-absorbing the fragment of the Golden Crystal from the Android's brains. His coat changed from brown to a pearly white, wings beginning to sprout from his back. A golden horn began to push out from his forehead, glinting in the light.

"It's so..... hard...." Naru exhaled in awe, reaching out to touch it.

"Wanna go for a ride, Baby?" Elios asked Naru suggestively.

"Oh yeah, yeah....!" Naru exclaimed, hopping on the Pegasus' back.*

* Or Alicorn, whatever. Shush.

"H-Hey!" Nephlite protested as they flew down the hallway and out of sight. "That's my wife!"

"You owe me!" Neptune yelled. "What about the nGo?!"

"I got my body fool," Elios rapped from the distance, "I quit bein' yo damn tool!"

Neptune's face wrinkled up in a momentary spasm of ire.

"Oh GAWD it IZ biggah!" Naru could be heard screaming in delight as her voice faded away.

Nephlite stood there for a moment, looking down at the shattered dead body of Chibimecha, and pondering the loss of his pedophilic princess.

Neptune looked at Ginga TV, seeing the floating body of Mutanex, and the small impromptu parade that was forming to celebrate Azabu's newest superhero, the Sailor Senshi named Aluminum Siren. She bowed her head and sighed, dropping her transformation.

"Way to go, Genius," Nephlite finally said, breaking the leaden silence. "The alien and the robot are dead, My WIFE left me for HORSE and Juuban has a new hero. Now what?! HUH?! huh?!" He walked up to Michiru's face and pressed into it, nose to nose, challenging her.

Without saying a word, Michiru hauled off a swift, elegant uppercut and sent Nephlite crashing across the room. Turning, she pressed a button on the conference table, summoning two uniformed guards who grabbed the stunned General.

"Damn you, Kaioh...." Nephlite began to splutter.

"Toss him in the trash," Michiru snapped, as the gods dragged him out.

Michiru sighed and looked at down at her black and white nGo T-Shirt. Such promise. Such potential. Oh well, that's what she got for hiring incompetents to carry out her affairs.

Looking up at the picture of her grandmother, she smiled. Yes, like her, she would fight on her own for her goals, using her own strength.

Casting her gaze down to her bare left ring finger, Michiru smiled.

Her next goal would not be something as useless as the world or more fame than she already had.

"My next goal...." Michiru chuckled to herself as she looked up at a face on the giant TV screen.... "Is you, Ten'ou Haruka!"

Her laughter echoed throughout the halls.

"O HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO"

THE PLANET SEDNA, 8902 A.D.

"Hahahahaaha Elios-chan," Chibiusa smiled, the memories flooding back to her. "Who knew, back then, what would happen to him..." She wrapped her arms around herself for a moment and rocked a little.

Sakura nodded. "I think if the others from that time period were to be told, they might lose a good eighth of their mass to spontaneous bowel movement." She laughed lightly.

Chibiusa grinned. "Yup!" She leaned forwards and leveled her gaze with Sakura's.

"Hey..." she began softly. "Tell me about Hotaru-chan."

"Hotaru-P..." Sakura nodded to herself and leaned back, thinking, a small smile reaching her lips as she recalled one interesting incident she had secretly witnessed on a trip back to the past.

NEXT TIME ON THE SUBURBAN SENSHI THIRD ANNIVERSARY OVA, FINAL EPISODE

How come Haruka, Michiru and Setsuna get those funky flower petals and the Orchestral Choir? What's with Hotaru? Is she chopped liver or something? Why doesn't the Leader of the Outer Senshi get any respect?! Next Time on Suburban Senshi's Third Anniversary OVA: "Respect my Authority!" You better get ready!

ZINGER

"Yes, it took my mother to restore honour to the family line, which she did with a swift kick to the crotch of his pants." Michiru nodded solemnly.